Considering Children as More Important Than Yourself
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look not to his own interests, but rather to the interests of others.
-Philippians 2: 3-4
It should go without saying that 2020 has been the most unusual year I’ve experienced. From being in a pandemic to racial injustices and an election year, it’s been quite the year. We could each give a personal account of how much this year has impacted our lives.
However, I wonder along with Paul in Philippians 2, how we are engaging the interests of others. More specifically, I’m concerned about our beloved children.
It is so easy to look inwardly to my own needs, and I’m sure that’s not just me. I could make a list of all the hardships and obstacles this year has thrown at me. But in Philippians 2, Paul reminds me to look to the hardships and obstacles of others.
The question remains: How are we seeking to serve our children who have experienced their own trauma throughout this year?
We must figure out how to serve and love our children who have experienced their own trauma through this year.
So, what is going on?
I don’t claim to have all of the answers nor have I done any of this perfectly, but we can work together to plan, converse, and focus on serving our children.
Even more than adults, children may not be able to communicate their emotions or needs to the same degree. How then could we expect to know a child’s need?
Due to COVID, some of us have been given an extended time with our families that we wouldn’t have had otherwise. During this time, we as parents may have observed moments of fear and moments of heartbreak in our kids. We may have noticed them acting out of character. We may have even seen a sort of regression in maturity or behaviors.
In addition to being the director of children’s ministry at my local church, I am also a full time public school teacher. March 2020 changed public education in a way I have never experienced before.
I had to become an online teacher overnight, and likewise, our students became online students. This changed so much for children. Expectations changed and even rose for them with little to no training or time to adapt.
Months later, going back to school in-person may have helped bring some sense of normalcy to our children, but then they had to adapt to what the “new normal” at school looked like due to health and safety protocols to prevent the spread of COVID.
But they keep moving forward.
As a teacher, I hear the concerns and stories about what students have endured during this year. They share their own thoughts on the news they see or hear. I can get a small sense of their fears and opinions with what is going on in the world around them.
As an educator, I can also see the gaps in their education most likely due to a variety of factors during students’ online schooling. Some factors I am aware of, such as lack of support and resources to complete the remaining of the previous school year online. Others I am not.
I attempted to analyze every behavior my students had to find a correlation to see how being out of school and quarantined has affected them. However, there’s no way to see or know exactly how affected they are by all of this with just plain sight.
But there is something I do see clearly—resilience!
Have you thought about all that our children have gone through? They’ve been acclimating to a new way of learning, transitioning from face-to-face to online school, dealing internally and externally with newly experienced emotions, adapting-to and following all safety protocols, all while attempting to navigate to understand the current state of our nation.
Wow!
Children have actually overcome a lot. We need to acknowledge that fact and realize that they have been affected by it all.
Well, what can we do?
Whether we are a parent, educator, pastor, ministry leader, family, friend, or just a concerned Christian, we can all do something.
Serve parents. We are able to love children by supporting parents too! Provide dinner, offer to babysit to give parents a date night or some alone time, send a family a board game, cover them in prayer, or just ask them what they need.
Pray. Intercede for our children, pray for their parents, pray for teachers, pray for those leading and shepherding children. Pray for all to fix their eyes on Jesus through this time and experience him in a way that grows and matures us all.
Seek wisdom. Ask God for wisdom for what kids need. Pray for ways to do activities that would help build relationships with children and give them a way to safely express themselves.
Be gracious. In whatever way you interact with children, remember to be a steward of grace. We can be patient and gracious towards children just as our Heavenly Father is to us.
Be vigilant. Be observant and sensitive to children’s behaviors. If something feels off, don’t ignore it. Don’t assume a child is just misbehaving. More often than not, there is a reason why the child is behaving the way they are. Have a conversation with the child. See if you are able to discern what it is the child might need at this moment. Sometimes, they just need to release what is inside their mind and we can help navigate their emotions through it.
Be attentive. Be mindful when discussing things happening or watching the news when little ears are present. They’re listening and taking it all in!
Be compassionate. Be aware of what is going on in our country, and be sensitive to the effects that these events can have on our children. Whether or not they affect you the same way, children may be angry, scared, or confused about certain events and discussions.
Join us. Join your church’s children’s ministry team to serve! (Shameless plug here!) Every children’s ministry can always use more people willing to love and serve our kids.
Who is the greatest?
A couple of weeks ago, our children’s church lesson was from Matthew 18:1-4. As the disciples looked to get validation of who’s the greatest, Jesus tells them that in order to be the greatest and enter the kingdom of God, they must be child-like. I was in awe of how Jesus spotlighted children in this instance.
Jesus magnified how, as a child, we should all trust him and be dependent on him.
What an important reminder to us all!
Let us pray and ask God to help us have a clear vision into the internal social, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs of our children. He is willing and able to allow us to be a light and an advocate in the lives of children. They need it, and they deserve it.
Sandy Yanes is a 3rd-grade bilingual math and science teacher in Splendora, TX, working on her 11th year of teaching. She holds a master's degree in Curriculum & Instruction.
In addition, she also serves as the Director of Children's Ministry at Higher Expectations Church in Humble, TX. She is the mother to a beautiful, mature, and amazing teenage daughter named Sandra and a Yorkie Poo named Smapde.
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